Anxiety and Dating don’t go well together: is that what you’re thinking? – maybe you have to rethink it.
Being anxious is part of dating someone; don’t get me wrong, I’m talking about the butterflies in your stomach and the rush that you feel in your body – this is a good feeling.
You probably say: “Yeah, that’s fine, but what about when I can’t cope with it?” – Well, this is another type of anxiety; it’s your brain in “fight or flight” mode.
On one hand, you want to do it, but something inside you is preventing you from achieving your goal – Am I right?
Before the date, do some breathing exercises; here’s how:
1. Sit in a chair in an upright position (be comfortable), put your hands on your lap or legs;
2. With your eyes open, breathe in slowly, breathe out slowly – repeat this five times;
3. Close your eyes and breath normally (feel the fresh air getting in your nostrils, and breathe out);
4. It’s normal that you’ll think about several things; don’t worry, our brain is set to work that way – acknowledge it, don’t identify with your thoughts, and continue anchored to your breath;
5. To begin with, do this ten times, and more ten;
6. Slowly open your eyes and deep breath in and out.
You’ll feel lighter, more focused, and less anxious about the date.
You can do this breathing exercise before the date, but I highly recommend that you establish a commitment to do it; develop a daily practice and by doing so, your anxiety levels will decrease or even cease to exist.
See the date as a regular thing that you have to do: schedule it on your calendar and just go without establishing expectations – this is one of the main things that will increase your anxiety.
In the first minutes, focus on the person, on the conversation; that way, your attention will divert to external things, and your brain will just put you in dating mode.
Yes, the brain does what you tell him to do: say that you’re feeling calm; at first, it will resist but keeping tell him that, after a while, it’ll just make you feel good – strange, isn’t it?
It’s the power of the mind in action.
Think of your brain as a muscle that you have to tame; when you do so, it will resist, but with consistency, it will respond accordingly in a dating environment or whatever the event may be.
Oh, by the way, have significant dates, but don’t get hooked – now that you have the necessary tool to do it confidently.
